IT TAKES A VILLAGE, PEOPLE

I see no hamsters in here...

The birth of a blog. Like children, it takes a village to raise a blog. Conversation in my home:

Me: Honey, I am writing a blog.
Husband: M'kay.
Me: Can you get on the computer and make one for me?
Husband: Mm-hmm. Wait, what are the paper and pen for?
Me: My blog.
Husband: A blog or a grocery list?
Me: I am a paper girl, living in a blogger world! Smart-ass, do computer stuff and I'll write whatever.

I'll poke around anyways

Husband: Alright, I'll crack the whip and get the hamsters moving inside the computer...
Me: I knew there were rodents involved...
Husband: Careful, I'll get rat-traps...
Me: I'll call PETA...

A loving, supportive marriage is the cornerstone to birthing blogs.

HOW CAN I GET PAID FOR PLAYING VIDEO GAMES

Wait, which button is jump?

No one will pay me for playing video games. Seriously, I have asked around and the answer is no. So it appears that the Department of Defense will not pay me to play Battlefield 3 or Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3 and give them pointers. Maybe if I was an extra twitchy 12 year old boy with hard earned callouses from years of hitting the "x" and "o" buttons, and suffering only slightly from video battle fatigue, would I serve a purpose. I been passed up by the X-Box Generation. Cry me a digital river.

Romeo's got mad skillz

What do you figure the exchange rate on Farm Dollars is to US Dollars? I think I might be a billionaire. It turns out that thousands of hours spent "farming" does not translate into actual farming experience. Nor does my produce sell for anything on the open market.


So, I guess dear readers you are stuck with my opinions a little longer. Unless any of you would like to buy my silence. There is a price-tag. Reasonably priced. Really, make me an offer.

I NEED MONEY, YEAH MONEY

Um, it used to work, I promise

Well, I am officially broke. Job dried up, unemployment benefits too, the IRA, 401K, and savings account. So I am looking around for things to sell. Does anyone want a "vintage" HP iii printer? Slightly abused. No? Okay, how about a cranky-ass cat named Simon. Slightly disturbed, deep emotional problems really. I am actually waiting for him to kill me in my sleep. Don't let that dissuade you from making an offer. No?

Simon, spawn of the underworld

Well, I have opinions...lots of those. I guess I could write a blog. How hard can that be? I have interesting things to say, even if I can't think of any at the moment. Simon just ran head first into a window. Don't call PETA. His head has hit worse.

So I will embrace my new life as blogger because, frankly, I need cash. Also, it kind of feels like everyone else went on to live a more interesting life than me. I could live vicariously. Like a peeping tom. Ever feel that way? Of course you have... I know someone who is living the life I want, and I bet he is living the life you want too. Coming soon, an interview with a local South Florida rock-n-roll god. Yeah, I'll bring the goods...